I have been struggling throughout this two years!!
People keep asking what make me so tends.
The main reason will me on my academic (my school life).
To emphasis more on it, I would like to say it's Form 6 hectic life.
I am blessed to manage to get into form 6 and I'm very sure I can.
But, choosing this path make my life change TOTALLY!!!
Firstly, I'm a failure in my exam!! I done quite badly. This is due to my life's surrounding has changed. I'm alone and most of the time I'm so lonely in school. There are some obstacles at home during this two years. This cause me lost my mood to study hard. But I'm confident to say that I am a very good "maid" or "housewife". LOL...In the sense of studying, I failed. Each of everytime I warmed up to "chiong" in my studies, there must be another problem coming up. I'm so damn tired. Asking God, when is the proper and ideal time that you prepare for me to study?? Can youjust imagine that, a student need to cook dinner for his/her family every weekdays? At night, tv is on and no study room is provided, where can he/she study? Not only this, sometimes need to do extra house chores!!! Anyone just approuch any of the top student and ask them whether they are in the situation as bad as I mention above. I think the answer to get "NO"isalmost 100%. That's why I always mention that life is not fair!! And it will never be fair!!!
Secondly, my performance in school is also ulter compare to my form 5 year!! Although I the deputy of head girl in school, but, do anyone mind about it? Who cares?? I'm as if an ordinary prefect. Okay, I'm fine with it!!! Proceed to the co-curricular activities, I'm active in sport!! My so called "KK marks" for sport can get very high. But, there is always a 'but', my uniform body and club doesn't help me. I joined scout since form 1 and Interact Club since form4. Problems will be, Interact Club conduct a meeting on every Wednesday which is the day that I couldn't attend due to the transport problem!!! The junior, who never tolerate and making me lost my spirit with all this activities. One word, disappointed!! Plus, I am the only interactor for upper six student. I bet they never "put me in their eyes". Hahaha...forget about it. All I can say is, when we are still student, we need friends a lot. Since all my form 5 buddies pursue their study in private college, I have no more close friends around to cooperate together! As I am born from beta, but now mixed with alphaian, I will never deny that I'm just an alient!! Haiz....
No one can understand my feeling unless you stand on my side and think!! This is a miserable life!! All I can see is dull and black all around me!! No more happiness and excitement in my form 6 life!! T.T
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